Redefining Success.

I just arrived back to the North from Kumasi for my In-Service training. It was a week filled with sessions about writing grants, exercises related to HIV, and thinking about potential projects in our villages. I really loved reuniting with my health/watsan sector, and it was interesting to see how the conversations have changed since we all left training to go to our sites. Instead of discussing our fears and excitements about language learning, leaving our friends, and trying to figure out what we'd do once we got to our villages, our conversations since becoming volunteers have moved to the challenges and triumphs we've had so far at site, funny stories about integrating into our communites (or failing to do so), and our plans for projects. Overall, it was a great week!
This training got me thinking about a lot of things related to the duties of a volunteer and what it means to do the work that I do. I view much of my job as helping people in my community plan and implement projects to move them toward further development. So far, this has manifested in me helping my fellow volunteers with projects that encourage people to take control of their health and educate them about the relationship between behavior and overall health. I've found that I feel most effective as a volunteer when I'm teaching a lesson, attending a conference, or executing an event (makes sense). It gives me a feeling of accomplishment, and the more people who attend whatever program I'm helping to put on, the more accomplished I feel.
Last week, however, made me re-think my role here and my goals as a volunteer. I tend to be a fairly driven person, and I have often, in the past, gauged my success by the quantity of the work I have done. In college, I felt that long papers and marathon study sessions were a reflection of my dedication, and I have always lived and breathed "good grades." I think I've taken this approach toward the first few months of my service here, though I haven't necessarily made a conscious effort to do so. For me, writing proposals, educating lots of people, and completing physical projects have been the benchmarks by which I've been subconsciously (and consciously) evaluating my work and future planning. In our Pre-Service Training (my first three months in Ghana), we heard numerous staff and current PC volunteers echo the idea that being successful as a volunteer is so much more than just doing lots of work. I listened to these people, though I'm not sure I totally took control of that idea, or rather, I felt like that approach would work for some volunteers, but I didn't want to leave Ghana without having plenty of tangible projects under my belt.
Needless to say, I didn't exactly take the "lay low for the first 3 months at site" advice to the level that some of my colleagues did. I didn't start too many projects on my own, but I jumped at every opportunity to help with fellow volunteers' projects and became known among some people in my training group as over-eager and maybe even hasty. The thing that my fellow PC volunteers learned (and I am just starting to grasp) is that the whole point of not starting projects when you first come to your site is a lesson in patience and re-evaluation of what constitutes success. In the past week, as I've reflected on my time in Gushie so far, I've realized that even though I've helped with campaigns and taught lessons, what stands out in my mind so far are the moments I've had celebrating festivals, struggling through the language, and mastering the art of shopping at the market. These are successes, but in a different way than I have been evaluating success. Sitting on a bench with my friends or stirring a pot of soup represents more than just cultural lessons. These activities teach me about my community, help me to build relationships that are the cornerstone to any development work, and change my understanding of the world around me. When I leave Ghana, I don't want my legacy to be that of "the girl who built us things" or "the volunteer who did a lot of work," though that doesn't mean there isn't value in projects and education (there definitely is!). I want my community to remember me as a friend and a colleague. I want the value of my work to be on relationships rather than statistics. I want to look back and recognize that the integration process and development process were equal contributors to my success as a volunteer.
I don't want to sound preachy, but I think it's important to share these lessons with you because they are truly forming my experiences here. Maybe you've already learned these things. Maybe you've already put material success in its proper place beside relational growth. But then again, maybe you're like me, and you're just now starting to learn these principles. It's really hard to redefine success beyond tangible results, particularly so when you are an American, I believe. Yet I'm starting to realize that when you just benchmark your success according to how much "work" you've accomplished, you're missing one of the most important triumphs in life, which is how many lives you've touched. And that doesn't come from building latrines and handing out mosquito nets; that comes through relationships with your community.